Friday, September 5, 2014

When Worlds Collide

I didn't -- really still don't -- have a post ready this morning. I am now deep, deep into the final draft of The Boy With the Painful Tattoo (don't forget to order it at that special pre-order price!) and it is just so difficult to interact with the outside world now.


Partly that's the constraint of time. Partly it's simply the difficulty of slipping between worlds.


But if I had time, I would be posting about the strangeness of creative animals and social media. It's not a natural or easy blend. Creative people tend to be over-sensitive and introverted -- their isolation is not always forced upon them, in fact it is probably rarely forced upon them. The older I get, the more I suspect that isolation may be one of the necessary ingredients for creativity.


Which is why I think so often reviews and authors go badly. I've heard non-creative people say things like, "If authors are going to put their work into the world, they have to be able to 'take it.'"


"It" being the constant barrage of white noise commentary from outside.


And, like I said, that's a non-creative person talking.


I've been thinking more and more about this uncomfortable melding of social interaction and the creative temperament. I watched a couple of documentaries the other evening about Vivian Maier. Even if you don't watch the documentaries, check out her work. Basically she shot something like one hundred thousand incredible photographs -- and never shared a single one with anyone.


AND around the same time that I was mulling over the question of how much of art is simply for ourselves, a reader friend pointed me to yet another author behaving badly on Facebook.


This author was saying something we ALL privately think: why do readers contact us personally to ask questions they could easily answer themselves by checking our website? Why take my valuable and limited writing time up to ask which book comes next in a series? Or when the next book is coming out? Or have you ever thought of writing another Adrien English book? Or...well, you get it.


And of course the answer is, the reader wishes to contact YOU, the author. It's not really about anything other than that. Anyone savvy enough to find your email address has already found your website and is aware she or he could find the information they need for themselves.


But this writer snapped. A combination of things probably happened. She began to believe her own promo efforts, she didn't know what or how to share so she was babbling incessant and tiresome nonsense, and the constant strain of being a public person began to show. She said The Unthinkable.


WHY ARE YOU BOTHERING ME?


And the result was predictable. Readers were outraged. Loudly. In multiple comments.


And rightly so. I mean, how the hell hard is it to hire someone to answer your email and FB posts if you can't keep up? Pull yourself together, sweetcheeks. Shut up and hire a personal assistant to pretend to be you.


And yet, I do feel an unlikely sympathy for this socially challenged soul. Demanding smooth social interaction from a creative -- often highly strung -- personality is probably asking for trouble. Even mostly calm and well-trained social animals like myself snap now and then. Harried and chased into the brush by screaming madmen with pointy spears, I'm not alone in thinking What the heck do you WANT from me?


I'm not sure even readers know the answer to this question. That's how messed up social media has made normal social interaction.


But I think I will leave it there and allow you all to comment -- or not -- on this dilemma of the creative social animal. For myself, the more I know about the artist, the more difficult it is to enjoy the work. And yet the current trend is for the artist to share as much of themselves as possible in as many channels as they can manage.


What does this mean for art? What does this mean for the artist?







73 comments:

  1. GOOGLE IT! I'M BUSY! isn't the best answer to give anyone, but hell, I said it the other day to my kid and to one of my best friends. It happens. She's not the antichrist (or the antchrist as I see they are calling Obama now). She snapped. Her reaction isn't unforgivable-- stupid, sure--and irrevocable given the unbelievable reach of the internet. Words typed can never, ever be taken back. Also, nude selfies aren't a good idea, but don't blame the victim. Uh. I think I'm done.Peace. I'm working FOR GOD'S SAKE LANYON STOP BOTHERING ME WITH ALL YOUR THINKING.

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  2. As someone really, really new to this world the very first thing I was schooled upon was never respond to a bad reader review and always put a pleasant face on social media. The internet is NOT our friend in that one slip up can and will stay with us the rest of our lives.Better to run and hide in the bushes sometimes than engage And her reaction sounds like how I talk to my husband or kids when I'm fed up. But they're stuck with me. They have to love me. :) Wait you mean you AREN'T going to write another Adrien English book?? REALLY?? WHY NOT??

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    1. Seriously, I love that people so dearly wish for another Adrien book. The question that cracks me up is the "Have you ever thought of..."

      :-D :-D :-D

      Like this would somehow never have occurred to me.

      But it's endearing too.

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  3. It's not necessary for me to socially interact with the artists that I enjoy. It's an added bonus, but certainly not a necessity. Being friends with a few authors, I know that they are mostly introverts. It's kind of the nature of the beast. But if an artist chooses to put themselves out there, they have a responsibility to protect their brand. Anyone who deals with people get asked stupid questions. I know I sure do in my job. But I treat that customer as if his question is the most important thing in my world at that given moment. Because it is. There are a lot of people in the country that can sell what I'm selling. I need to make sure that my customers WANT to buy from me. Do I hang up the phone and bitch to my friends and co-workers? You bet I do! But I hope I never ever let my customer see anything but happy and pleasant. That's my job. If the author in question were my friend, I would gently counsel her that maybe she needs to back away from social media for a bit, because obviously it's becoming overwhelming. It is easy to hire an assistant or have someone else on the page who can deal with the minutiae. I have been watching the likes on this person's fan page and it hasn't changed too much, it goes up and down minutely. So I imagine in the long run, this won't make much difference to the readers. Any publicity is good publicity? I dunno.

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    1. Protecting your brand. Yes. This is the tough one for authors -- for all creative types -- because we are not generally business-minded. In the good old days, other people handled this piece of the puzzle for us. And with good reason.

      I think that authors must consider seriously whether it is to their advantage to be out and about on the webz or whether a little mysterious and enigmatic silence might better suit them? OR hire someone.

      Seriously. HIRE. SOMEONE. Someone smart and pleasant who can better represent the brand than the mad scientist in the basement laboratory -- because sometimes that is the reality.

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    2. I don't think all publicity is good publicity.

      But I do know that the public has a short memory -- Way Way Back Machine notwithstanding.

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    3. I do have to say, that I read with no little amount of amusement that she posted this morning and said that her publisher asked her to delete the offensive posts, then proceeded to insult her readers AGAIN, in the post explaining why the posts were gone. It's like a train wreck, I got no dog in that hunt at all, but I just can't seem to stop reading it. I'm a little bit ashamed of that. But mostly curious as to how it's going to play out.

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    4. Yes. I agree. It's fascinating and -- awful to admit this because I think she's genuinely losing it -- funny. She just can't shut up. And that is someone who has come to the breaking point.

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  4. Well, with you I always had to opposite trouble: I had to tell you ''Stop answering my comments and go relaxing/writing/swimming!'' ;-).

    Anyway the thing with asking questions one could easily answer for oneself is not only reserved for authors. If this may comfort your lot it irritates me as well, also because time (especially mine ;-) is precious.

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    1. Yes, indeed. So much of social media is simply pointless blabbering. Worse, blabbering mostly to one's self! It's so strange.

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  5. Said author also whined quite vigorously, with an obvious overtone of entitlement, about her most recent release not making the NYT bestseller list. She seemed to feel betrayed by readers. "I put so much work into it!" My reaction: Oh boo-effing-hoo. Cry me a river, lady.

    Sure, we're all prone to throwing ourselves pity parties, but it's best not to throw them on social media. Expressing disappointment or commiserating with fellow authors is excusable, I think. Pitching hissy fits or donning the mantle of martyrdom is not, and a sure way of alienating readers. So, yeah, hiring a PA and staying off the Internet is the way to go if you're a creative person who lacks impulse control.

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    1. I do think it comes back to the inability of most people to judge what is appropriate to share -- and what will be of interest to others.

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  6. Like moths to a flame, the non-creative see the beauty/creativity and want to touch. You can't get that connection by going to a website to look up information. It's not about the information. It's about a connection to the beauty, to the creativity. It's why there are 'patrons,' to the arts. I think hiring a stand in to sort through the social media is wise choice. While I think most, (clearly, not all) creative types like to share their art at some point, no one likes to be touched or looked at every day...and I agree, WHAT? No more Adrien English???

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    1. Yes. Yes, of course that is it. It is that desire to make contact. To connect.

      But so much of social media is the illusion of connection versus making real contact with another person.

      I think this comes back to quality versus quantity of shared information.



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    2. You are right about the illusion of social media. I fear we are all a bunch of blind men touching the elephant. It means something different to each of us.

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  7. Oh boy, I sure don't envy you authors (or any other artists) for this. The social media part of your job must be so tricky. And not only all the craziness going on there (here, LOL), but also the time-consuming part. I wouldn't last a day in your shoes. And that's why the advice of hiring people to do some of the social media promotion and email answering sounds like an extremely sane and good advice.

    And also — if you don't draw the line, nobody else does it for you. Although I do understand it's very difficult to do that when you have to keep up a certain image and especially difficult when readers have started to take this kind of communication with authors for granted.

    By the way, thank you for the Vivian Maier link, Josh. Wonderful stuff!

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    1. It's easy to forget how new social media is. We are all still trying to find that balance.

      It is almost funny to me to think that writing was once a solitary occupation. Now days I could spend all my time simply participating in social media. I haven't found a good balance yet, though I keep trying.

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    2. You should watch that documentary FINDING VIVIAN MAIER if you can. It's fascinating.

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  8. I'm a reader. And an introvert. I don't avoid social situations, or seek them. Personal interactions with the authors we love is equivalent to a backstage pass to a Beiber concert for a thirteen year old girl. We get all squealy. You "creative" people are just going to have to be a little patient with the fan worship of us "non-creative" types. We take the time, our time, to read your books. We spend the money, our money, to buy those books. We take the time, our time, to express to you our love for your work. Maybe those of us who are "non-creative" pains in your collective butts should be the ones giving you all a break from all that attention. We can save our money and our time.

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    1. You know, I honestly don't think that anyone believes being a "creative" person is somehow more intrinsically valuable than being a "non-creative" person. I don't think that's what's going on there.

      I think that the creative personality is often ultra-sensitive, overly imaginative, and can be highly strung. But these are not traits isolated to creative people. Plenty of not creative people are over-sensitive, etc.

      But you do bring up the interesting subject of reader entitlement. A post for another day! :-)

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  9. The weird part of all of this, and I suppose my age is showing since I grew up pre-internets, is how no one seems to see the need to censor themselves. They have a keyboard and they feel it's their right and duty to share every empty thought with the universe.

    The universe does not care.

    I'm a reader who follows a lot of authors, some family, and real life friends on one account. I have no reason or need to "be careful" but even so I watch what I say and what I put out there, even when casually interacting with real-life friends. I am careful about what I 'share' on Facebook.

    If I get upset (or more likely just annoyed) over someone else's diatribe, I just stop following because I don't want to hear/read it. Sometimes it's just best to step away from the keyboard/internet.

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    1. Yes. It is fascinating to see how many people believe that other people will be riveted by what they are eating or their latest clash with a coworker or a skin rash or...whatever.

      TMI is not just about highly sensitive revelations. I think it accurately represents most of social media.

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  10. As my mother used to tell me "It's not what you're saying, it's your tone of voice." You share a lot with us, Josh, triumphs and frustration, but I don't ever remember you being insulting or dismissive with anyone. I agree with M - you have to protect your brand - and you also appear to understand that very well. I like knowing the person behind the book. It's definitely not necessary, but it does enrich the experience.

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    1. I've got great readers and I enjoy interacting with them. I suspect part of why I continue to enjoy that interaction so much is early on I set up parameters. That makes it easier on all of us.

      I try to stay focused on talking about the books, the work, publishing -- the writing/reading world. I try to keep in mind what I find interesting as a reader.

      I rarely read reviews. I limit my social media time. I treat people as I wish to be treated. Those are my basic guidelines and so far they work.

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  11. The big take-away here for me should be that an author's primary rule of social media should be: first do no harm. We put so much pressure on ourselves to be more and more active on social media, everybody tells us we need to be constantly "on," but if you're overwhelmed, stress beasting your way through the day, hanging at the very tippy end of your fraying tether, the LAST place you need to be is on social media as the writerly you. When I snap, dh is legally required to put up with my crap (LOL) and much more likely to forgive me a snarly moment. Readers and fans? Not necessarily. *Especially* since dh is fully aware of the ongoing behind-the-scenes horrible dreck that I'm not sharing with the public for privacy reasons. That doesn't excuse bad behavior, no, but it could provide context.

    I'm extremely high strung. (Vast understatement.) Because I'm such a nutter, I limit my time on social media and feel no guilt about that whatsoever. Frankly, I'd rather take a promo fail on the chin than make an ass of myself.

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    1. The pressure to be constantly "ON" has got to be one of the most destructive elements of social media for celebrities and artists.

      No one can be on their best behavior all the time. No one can respond to every assault (and the more popular you are, the more those tests will come) with good natured grace. And I don't care how patient you are, the millionth time someone asks you a question, the weariness is liable to show.

      That's the reality of being a human with limited resources.

      I think limiting one's social media activities is good for that reason alone.

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    2. The insidious thing about the online part of being "on" is that it brings the public into your living room where your defenses are down. A celebrity can avoid the public by staying home or going someplace quiet, but when it's online, when YOU want to surf or just hang out, the conversation is in your face, whether you want it or not.

      I'm still trying to figure out how to turn off 75% of my Facebook feed with all the depressing stories and shares. Most by my friends. I've started to un-follow. I may need to continue, even if they are family.

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    3. Yes. And there's a lot of passive-aggressive interaction too. Half the time you're being copied into conversations that if you were to respond to, you'd be lambasted.

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    4. Hey Susinok, long time no see. Sorry to barge in here but

      "I'm still trying to figure out how to turn off 75% of my Facebook feed with all the depressing stories and shares. Most by my friends. I've started to un-follow. I may need to continue, even if they are family."

      Yes, I agree. I wonder if it's the difference in how people socialize. Like, when I'm online, I like to pretend that I'm at a party and so I try to keep the conversation interesting and entertaining because I'm viewing the conversation to be the entertainment onhand. But you know there are always those people at the party who are either staring morosely into the fireplace (or at the cat) or who are just looking to lock some victim in a deep, depressing (or violently heated) conversation.

      I think the same dynamic occurs online.

      I mean, I have a lot of friends (and family members) who I love but would think twice about taking to any party just for the sake of the other people present.

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    5. You're always welcome to barge in here. You've always got something interesting to add to the conversation.

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  12. Thank you for mentioning the difficulty of "slipping between worlds." I'm finishing book 3 while line edits of book 2 landed in my in-box. Painful :-) I'm just so scared to switch back and forth - I think neither book would benefit. As for the social media, it's a distraction, as evidenced by me being here instead of writing.

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    1. One of the strangest aspects of social media is how it begins to influence the work itself. I am aware of readers in a way I never used to be -- and frankly, in a way I don't want to be.

      I don't know that this keen and constant awareness of others is good for art. Any art. In particular, writing and reading are increasingly interactive -- and I believe this is more likely to lead to mediocrity than satisfaction for author or reader.

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  13. I was having this talk with an editor friend of mine the other day, because as my popularity as an artist is growing, I feel like I should be on social media "more" and I'm trying to find out how to manage it, yet I don't feel the need to share more of "me". Honestly? I just can't imagine posting all my thoughts on it. I struggle posting something every few days. I answer others' posts here and there (such as this one) but I'm such a private person.

    It doesn't mean I'm ignoring people, and I do my best to answer every single person who contacts me, in the very same manner that you answered me more than a year ago. I'm getting more and more of it and this week in particular got very intense as a piece of art I did for a celebrity got tweeted by him to 200,000 of his followers. This is a whole new ballgame and level of attention I am finding unnerving.

    I try very hard to use the "Josh Lanyon" model of social interacting as I brave this new world. I find it is working very well for me in what I say and do for the most part. Thanks for setting the bar in a way that is really helping me. :)

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    1. We all get trapped on that hamster wheel: you can write the best book in the world, but if nobody knows about it...etc.

      Except if you are spending all your time on social media, you're NOT writing the best books in the world.

      Plus, first and foremost you should always be writing for yourself. I really do believe that, which is why too much awareness of the audience is probably more hindrance than help.

      But then again, if you want to sell books, you have to write books that sell, and how do you do that if you never listen to the audience?

      And therein spins the never ending wheel...

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    2. Yes to all of this! I do very blindly at times just create things that make me happy and post those; the silly irreverant art. But that first piece of silly art found an audience of its very own and now I've ended molding those to make people happy and fit *their* requests. There is that hamster wheel you speak of. I didn't even know how wide the audience was who pays attention to it until the celebrity reached out to me and commissioned a piece of their own through FaceBook. So pleasing the the "audience" in this one way ended up getting me some notoriety I never could have imagined.

      This is a strange new world we live in, with social media. Very strange.

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  14. Is it bad that the main thing I got out of this is that, for once, I missed the crazy and I am beyond happy about that? :)

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    1. Don't you worry! There's always going to be more than enough crazy to go around. ;-)

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  15. Oh dear, no one should get near the internet when you are in a fouled mood or just plain tired. Authors and readers!

    Hmmm.. Maybe if she had put a smiley at the end, it wouldn't be so bad?

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  16. I'm a reader and have a few friends who are writers. What I don't think a lot of readers necessarily understand is writers are people too, and can be just as flawed and unpolished as we are. Some writers are more adept at social media and all things 'fan' but some aren't. It's a fact of life that readers need to get over. That being said, it's a horrible Catch-22 for a writer. You have to have a social media presence these days because it's a part of the new business model, but readers can be clueless and selfish with the way they take up a writer's time. Today is all about instant this and instant that. "I posted on Josh Lanyon's page two days ago and that son of a bitch hasn't even had the courtesy to respond!!" (Nevermind the fact you posted earlier that you were knee deep in edits for the next week and would be scarce.) As a person you probably want to verbally and publicly smack me down, but as a writer you're not allowed. It's not fair, but it is what it is. The writer's only recourse then is to limit his/her time on social media but that has its own drawback and detriments. I don't believe just because a writer puts him/herself out there they are obligated in any way to respond beyond a perfunctory manner. The rest is gravy. Like I said, some are better at it. Some have more time. Some have help doing it. I would love nothing better than chatting for hours on end with my writer friends, but I consciously limit my time interacting with them because I know they're busy interacting with other fans and friends and also have a full schedule in their own life to attend to. And as difficult as it is at times, I try not to take it personally when I don't get the in-depth response or the frequency in communication I would have liked.

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    1. Good insights, Steve. And you know sometimes it feels like everyone is having interesting conversations and I'm the kid who has to go practice his piano lessons instead of joining in. Because writing is my job and it's a demanding job. I still regularly work ten hour days. So while everyone is chatting around the water color, I have to get back to my desk and start writing again. And the party goes on without me. Even if it's technically MY party. :-D

      It's just the reality.

      Up until about a year ago I used to make a point of answering every individual comment everywhere. Every tweet, every FB comment, every Goodreads comment, every comment addressed to me. Public and private. But it eventually reached a point where it was physically, logistically impossible to do that -- unless answering comments was going to be my fulltime job.


      It was hard to let that go, to accept that one of the realities of social media was that the more people following and friending me, the less personal contact would be possible. It's an interesting dilemma.

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    2. I know just what you mean about having to leave the water cooler and get back to work. I wish I had a job that allowed me to be on Facebook more during the day but I don't and I find myself envying those who have the time to chat and banter and whatnot. Most of the time I feel like I'm playing catch up. I hate missing out on some of those good discussions while they're happening, but that's the sad reality of my evil day job.

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    3. Mine too! :-)

      Yes, everything is an evil day job once it becomes something you must do every day to survive. ;-)

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  17. Like M I am working with customers, I try to be authentic, but friendly, if I cannot be friendly anymore, then I am polite. On the web I do the same, I try to be friendly/ polite and keep my sarcastic remarks to myself. (In English is that not so difficult, because I'm slower.) Please note, I say what I am thinking, but I control myself.
    I don't have so much free time, so there a many days I give the social media 15 minutes and that is it. A author, who use the social media as a promotiontool and is feeling sieged and overburden , should really hire a personal assistent.
    I was astonished that you has really answered to my questions and I have enjoyed that and I hope I will enjoy it! But if you have no time, or it is taking more and more time away from things you would love to do, put a sign on your door: WRITING or LIVING.

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    1. I always enjoy our interactions. :-)

      But I like people. So it is easier for me.

      But liking people or not, there are only so many hours in the day, and a couple of minutes here, there, everywhere soon add up to three and four hours.

      Somewhere there has to be a balance, but I hear a lot more from authors struggling then from those who have found the balance.

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  18. As a reader, I genuinely love it when authors respond to one of my comments, or one of my tweets. However, I never *expect* them to. I fully realize that they have busy busy lives and if responding to my stupid little tweet about them is not on the top of the to-do list, I am perfectly fine with that. Still, when they do take the time, I am extremely grateful, and I love it. I love that I can occasionally have a late-night chat about a movie we both love, or that when my family life was looking pretty nasty, they took the time to ask if I was ok. It was nice, and it made things just a little bit better. It is part of the reason I love the m/m community. So yeah, I get that I am not a priority in their lives, but I do love that I am occasionally worth 30 seconds of their time.

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    1. I have a number of friends who started out as readers I met on the internet, so yes to this. These kinds of interaction remain enjoyable for all of us -- and they are the reason social media took off in the first place.

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  19. Well, definitely a lot going on in your "I don't really have a post today, but if I did..." post. I certainly understand how someone can do very creative things for their own pleasure, but then I don't have the kind of personality that would allow me to share any of my stories, even though they are not real personal, well not person at all...
    But I digress, I don't actually expect much of anything from the authors I follow on FB just updates on releases and maybe a sneak peak or two...you just happen to be one of the most interactive of the list and since you have pretty much ruined me for most other writers I am going to hit you with a barrage of WTF? Are you kidding me? What kind of question is that? list. OK
    What order should I read your books? Is there a soundtrack? Do you recommend a good hangover food For an all-nighter, Lanyon marathon bender? Do you have a recipe for bouillabaisse. Is Kit and/or J.X. going to do a book signing at Cloak and Dagger? AND I know Adrien and Jake already have a coda, but is there any law that says they can't have 2....or 5? Ok, the last 2 questions are deadly serious.
    Now if it comes down to you interacting or writing amazing stories, I would rather you keep writing...except those last two questions....(insert smiley face here)

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    1. Ha!

      1 - Any order you like. But if you like to read series books in order, check out the side bar on the books page on my website.

      http://www.joshlanyon.com/the_works.html

      2 - Yes.

      3 - I recommend hash the way my mother made. Canned corned beef chopped into boiled potatoes with eggs and butter and pepper and salt.

      Whaddya mean you don't know my mother?!

      4 - http://www.epicurious.com/recipes/food/views/BOUILLABAISSE-238411

      5 - Yes

      6 - No. In fact, that could very well happen someday.

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    2. You're my hero....now get back to writing, I need to go make hash....I think my mom knows your mom.

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    3. My mouth is now watering for that hash. :-)

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    4. When social media brings on the smiles (rather than the smirks), it's definitely worth my time. This exchange just made my day. : )

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    5. Better yet, the bouillabaisse recipe looks amazing, we won't even mention the promise of a visit to Cloak and Dagger. (Big, gigantic grin)

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  20. I'm copying and pasting what I wrote on FB, because, well, time management and all ;-)

    Some very insightful comments on what is apparently a hot subject. So many people these days, in all areas of life, seem to want what they want, when they want it, no matter what - you can't please everyone. I see it every day as a business owner as well as here on FB. Different perspectives and expectations.. and on and on. Keeping up with social media definitely cuts into work time and messes with creative flow. It's become a discipline and a skill. Everyone who relies on it for communication and marketing has needed to find their comfort zone with it. Josh, my impression is that you handle it extremely well, but I know - from your many interactions with us as it just so happens - that you do struggle with finding a balance.

    The author who is making desparaging remarks to fans on her FB page displays a shocking lack of decorum... whether it's her norm or she has recent issues, I have no way of knowing, but a huge negative impression has been made.

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    1. Because social media is still in its infancy, I think we are all going to look back years from now bemused at our efforts to be everywhere at once interacting on all platforms.

      I know I have abandoned almost everything except for this blog, my Goodreads group, my Facebook pages and email.

      I use Twitter just for announcements, groups just for announcements. Once in a while I enjoy Pinterest. That's about it. I have started to cut back on guest posts, guest blogs, guest anything.

      I could use Goodreads for promo more -- there is a huge m/m group there that I belong to in theory, but haven't looked at in years. My only activity on GR is my own little group, where I love to talk books, writing, whatever with my reader friends. To me, that's when social media really works.

      Same deal with my FB pages. I pop in every morning, chat with friends -- I look at it like stopping to say hello to my neighbors on my way to the office. It makes for a better morning -- in fact, I look forward to that morning ritual.

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  21. I'm just a reader but really IMO what it comes down to, respect your fans, you can vent all you want but you don't have to hit submit/send/publish, etc.
    I myself have a crap ton of bad craziness going on in my life right now, but I throw a damn smile on my face when I deal with customers because I work retail and it puts food on my table.

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    1. I was nodding as I read this Carey. And I had an epiphany. It isn't just writers who fail to view themselves as professionals, as people running a business. It's also readers who fail to realize that a writer is just another small business owner. Another working person, a professional trying to earn a living in a competitive world -- just like themselves.

      Because writing is an art, and because there is a perception that writing must be a super fun job (only with a much higher tax rate), it's probably easy for both sides to forget to set boundaries. Or to respect boundaries.

      And I think the way we fix that is writers setting up realistic parameters. It's partly about the logistics -- there are only so many hours in a day -- but it's also about protecting your creative energy. Writing requires extreme focus and concentration, and that means turning off the outside world when you're supposed to be working.

      And it means the outside world needs to respect the GONE FISHING sign. ;-)

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  22. "And rightly so. I mean, how the hell hard is it to hire someone to answer your email and FB posts if you can't keep up? Pull yourself together, sweetcheeks. Shut up and hire a personal assistant to pretend to be you."

    Some people can't extend their creativity into the realm of business solutions, apparently.

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    1. I think one of the most shattering revelations of my young adulthood was the realization that a lot of writers are not very smart.

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    2. I know, right? Mine too. Seriously.

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  23. First I stopped turning on the TV every day because I couldn't seem to just let it into my life a little bit. I had become CNN's bitch, and the crawl at the bottom of the screen was my crack. Now I'm trying out not to be on FB every day. Checking it constantly became a habit, so I deleted the app from my phone and that helped a lot. I've come to realize that I could miss 95% of what I read on FB and not have missed a thing. And I'm sure others would say the same about my posts. But I'm not an author and I'm sure there is tremendous pressure to stay relevant on social media and market your work at the same time you're trying to write the next book. Especially if writers are self-published. Courting new followers and counting Likes and Comments is the worst of high school in some ways, but I guess a necessary part of publishing these days. And Twitter? FB on coke. It makes me feel so old and slow.

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    1. I'm happy to say I don't count comments or followers. In fact, I am going to have to do a purge of my FB "friends" in a couple of months because I'm about to hit that friend limit. And given that fact that probably half the people who friended me never interact with me, I doubt very much we shall miss (or even notice) when we part company. :-D

      But I do keep track of website hits and I do notice that my numbers (which average about 2500 page loads and 1500 unique visits a week right now) drop significantly when I am not out and about on social media.

      As in my numbers are about half of where they were a couple of months ago when I was out promoting Stranger on the Shore.

      And my sales drop too. Now granted I haven't had a new book out in months, so that's the main reason for the drop. But it's not the only reason, I fear.

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  24. First off, Thanks for making TBwTPT available as a PDF on Samshwords...that will work until I can order the PB.
    As for your comment " And yet the current trend is for the artist to share as much of themselves as possible in as many channels as they can manage."...I do feel sorry for artists in that this is what our society seems to have become, sharing every event of each minute of your life in as many mediums as possible. I value my privacy, I am still not on Facebook, or any of the other social sites.
    But as an artist, you have to reach your fans and stay on radar in order to survive in the business...which most of the time means putting on a happy face when you don't feel like it and being civil even when responding to idiots..... I don't envy you....but you are always gracious and handle everything with class.

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    1. Okay! Good to know the PDFs are still important to some readers. I did wonder if I needed to bother with those.

      I think part of the problem for authors in social media is mostly we live in our heads. Writing is not exactly an action-packed job or life style, and I don't really know that many fascinating authors. Myself included. So we run out of stuff to talk about and then end up boring everyone (ourselves included) with pictures of our lunches, our pets, our surgery scars, etc. OR the good old standby nekkid menz. Ugh.

      I try to stick to talking about what I find interesting from writers I admire -- and that basically is writing, publishing, the stories themselves. I'm glad most of my readers seem happy to talk about those things with me.

      The notion of sharing genuine interests is what made social media popular in the first place.

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    2. I love The PDF versions of everything! :)

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  25. I only discovered social media mb 2 years ago, so I am probably one of those offenders finding the authors and one singer that touched my life, yup wanting to connect to share the enthusiasm/joy over the works. Its also a way to interact and communicate.
    Im sure I have said things wrong many times. Mostly I try to praise but there are things that come out not as I intended. or perhaps come out to heavy? flattery? idk , I mean what I say tho. I guess I could stand back and claim its the isolation and the miscommunication of the aphasia left from an assault, but that may not be true.
    If I offend. I hope others will be honest, not brutal, but if that is in their nature, its ok. I'll be honest and admit, I have no clue if this "contacting" authors etc is a good or bad thing to do. In my enthusiasm I just searched for ways to share. I twitter to laugh and forget the days away,I read to think and be in another world . Those that succeed I tend to seek more of ,forgiveness to you all!
    I do think every person is entitled to an off day, frazzled,stressed etc, I tend to forgive insult altho I am often to dense to register the insults as well HAH.
    I discovered shortly when first starting twitter, that such media is a double edge sword, I was blasted for not being " gay enough, not being straight or bi "enough" for having to many females friended etc. Tbh i had been just trying to laugh with others and joking or flirting around for shits and giggles was awesome. SO if a nobody like me can be railroaded to social siberia, I cant imagine how insane it must get for anyone with a creative niche or a professional name.
    hah i tend to get sidetracked just saying Id tend to cut the author a break, we all make mistakes and as old adage goes, walk a mile in their moccasins before we judge.

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    1. I have dealt with a LOT of readers over the years, and it's pretty rare that I ever feel someone has crossed a line.

      Which is not to say that I can keep up with everything readers might wish from me -- even if I shared all those assorted wishes.

      I think readers find the new dynamic as confusing as authors do -- as you say yourself. It's new to all of us.

      If we are all going to be online and interacting 24/7 then there will be some missteps. I think good manners and patience can provide a safety net for all of us.

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  26. Two thoughts – the whole point of using social media for PR is to break down the wall between vendor and customer, expert and neophyte. I cringed when the CEO of the heritage organisation I worked for took to tweeting (well actually, he had a minion do it, because it would be a cold day in hell when he touched pleb-world with his own fair hands)…but it worked. Footfall at sites that had been featured…shared (just with you)…went up. The clever trick is the personalisation of what’s essentially an ad. It’s now ubiquitous and inescapable. Even CVs and LinkedIn profiles involve (gulp) lap-dancing. (Do you want me…do you really want me…?)
    The unanticipated knock-on is what happens when the walls are gone. The public do not stand politely waiting to be invited over the vanished boundaries. You have an audience 24/7, and they want what they want…which may not be what you want them to take from the experience. And because the name of the game is sharing, they’ll be in touch…about any damn thing. And this is where the internet&social media make me nervous – they’re means of contact at one remove. You never look into a face, hear a voice, or even see handwriting; you don’t know the person you contact, but the whole exchange will be conducted as though you’re intimates, and it will often happen in real time. Eeek. Instant response is *dangerous*. .
    With all that in mind, I do think it’s up to the blogger to be the grown-up. It’s a bit like running a B&B… strangers in and out of your home, you hope they’ll be nice and behave well, but you have to be prepared for the odd lout. And being prepared means keeping your cool whether you’re having a crap day or not. Everyone remembers Basil Fawlty. Nobody wants to revisit Fawlty Towers.

    HB

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    1. Yes. It is a delicate balance all the time. Done properly, it is the appearance of intimacy while never letting your guard down too far. It is sharing enough of the real you without sharing too much. That is not easy.

      And the writer personality, the writer temperament does need solitude. And a lot of it. I am social in bursts. I like people, I enjoy spending time with friends and family -- and I can go days without speaking. Or I could if I didn't live with someone who does require speech and interaction on a regular basis. :-D

      The other thing is, I know as a reader, I get curious now and then, but I really don't want to know too much about the writers I like because I don't want to start thinking of the writer when I am reading the stories. It messes up my suspension of disbelief. Big time.

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  27. It seems the dilemma here is the same as Hollywood stars who must live through the fans asking for autographs and paparazzi stalking. Because of the web, now we can stalk our own favourite authors whereas before you could maybe try and find them through their publishers with any luck.
    Now, if you want your book to sell, you have to sell yourself too with blogs and pictures to keep your readers' attention span from going to other more visible authors. It sucks to be a writer if you're not sociable in this day and age. I've written authors because I just loved their books and it's like touching John Lennon's sleeve as he walks by on his way to buy a bottle of milk. That the author responds is so flattering and creates such a gleeful reaction on my part is just great because I feel privileged they've answered me! But I do feel like I'm touching John Lennnon's sleeve: an unwanted physical attention I force upon someone who just wants to be left alone to buy his bottle of milk. I'm afraid I'm bothering them, stealing a moment just for myself. And it appears that that feeling is true sometimes.

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    1. I think where it becomes difficult is in bulk. It's not the individual reader -- speaking for myself, I have had very few negative experiences with individual readers (and very many delightful ones) -- but it is the pressure to be everywhere responding to everyone. THAT is difficult. Not least because the idea is that everywhere you (the author or artist) go you will be providing fresh and original content.

      Who is that person? It's not me. Even if I had a couple of extra hours in every day, I don't have that much to say. I mean, I work in my house by myself. :-D I like my life, but I would be the first to admit it's not the stuff of gripping narrative.

      In fact one thing I regret is that the more "popular" you become, the harder it is to find time to just chat with a few individual readers. There are more people you'd love to chat with -- and less and less time to chat.

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